Classical Convert

Underwhelming Magnetism

A few days ago I renewed my lapsed membership to my local NPR station, WSKG. I frickin’ love public broadcasting. It almost makes up for the lack of the BBC in my life, almost. Naturally, one of the completely overwhelmingly exciting (well, perhaps exaggerating just slightly here) parts of donating — aside from that warm, fuzzy, altruistic sensation — is the “free” gift. Last year I received this totally kick-arse mug:

If you can’t quite make it out, it’s all of the major composers’ signatures on it. It’s the perfect receptacle for sleepytime tea or IPAs (I think that mugs are ideal for beer consumption) two of my top beverages. It even came with an instruction sheet pointing out which name belonged to which composer for some of the more scribbly ones (Shosty, looking at you). Imagine my disappointment and cries of heartfelt anguish when I chose the car magnet and received this:

Which a brief poll of two people has confirmed as being the ugliest car magnet in the entire world. Enormous rainbow colored fiber-optic cables emitted from the globe does not particularly suggest classical music to my mind. It suggests something I am never going to put on my car. It’s my own stupid fault, I should have done the really noble thing and told them to not send me anything so that they can use all of my money for useful stuff such as, say, broadcasting. We all like our souvenirs, though. Next time I’ll go for the pocketknife.